Fuck appropriateness.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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