You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
