I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
