You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
