Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Randomize
