Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
how does that bad decision feel?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
