dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize