dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize