Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
She bit a glass in half.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
