Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
If its not for food we ain't going out.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
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