And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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