need another drink. this is the easiest way
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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