AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
