You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize