I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
NoShamevember. You game?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
