He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize