Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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