I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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