If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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