if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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