Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
