I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
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