my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
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