dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
