Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
