who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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