Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
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