Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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