Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Randomize
