dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
Fuck appropriateness.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
time to smoke my breakfast
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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