On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
