yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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