Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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