Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
should my penis look like a turkey
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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