do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize