I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
