it wasn't lemon gatorade
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
