Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
