so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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