my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
