we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize