There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize