Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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