first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Is her dick bigger than yours?
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
