am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
