Plan B is the new Plan A
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
