he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I am in a vortex of obligation.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
