Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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