This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
