the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize