Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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