I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
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