kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
